A new beginning...

I'm not sure how my life will unfold from this point on...but I am pretty sure at this point in my life that I am on a path that will take me to a place I will be happy about and at least feel good about my choices.

Today is Sunday evening and I finished my third week last Friday at the county as a clinician. I am overwhelmed but my supervisors and peers are telling me that I am doing very well and right on track. Awesome!!! One supervisor told me that she has heard only good comments from everyone about me at this point. I am managing with a few speed bumps but I am surviving so far and I am learning so much. This is truly a gift.

I am starting to see that I just need to settle in to a groove just like I did with being a professional musician...just like being an instructor at a college...just like being a business owner...just like running my own domestic violence and anger management groups...just like being an academic advisor...or a job coach...or several of the other jobs that I have had...it is just a matter of patience and persistence...of perspective...and adaptation.

Christmas has passed and we had a blast. You would have seen some of this and heard about it on Heather's blog by now I'm sure. We had such a good time with each other and with all the kids at Josh and Bree's house. It is so cool to have the chance to give each of them things that you can see in their eyes that they truly appreciate...I...just....love that. Everyone felt good and enjoyed themselves I believe. A few were a little under the weather but aside from that I think it was a great day.

Today was another great day. The boys weren't there for different reasons and Harmony is visiting family out of state...but we had a great time with family members and Sarah today. Again there are lots of things about it all on Heather's blog so I won't be redundant but suffice it to say that I am, as Heather is...so proud of that little girl and I love her so much. She has brought so much joy into the world and I am so grateful to be her dad. What an honor.

I am really really proud of all of my kids and I know that most parents wax on about their kids and all...but I frankly have real reasons to be proud of each and every one of them. They are all awesome people and I am just a blessed man for having been given the opportunity to have these great people in my life. It is an honor and I am humbled by the gift from God.

In my work now...I am spending time with a wide variety of people and some of them are really struggling with issues I would not wish on my worst enemy. I am trying to attempt to help them and I know in a few cases for sure I have been able to already...at least a little bit for now. But I wouldn't want to trade places with them. I do not know how I was so blessed...but boyOHboy am I glad I have been. Even with all the junk that has gone along with it...cause it has not been an easy road...and there are things to face in the future I refuse to look at currently...I still see more blessing than anything...and days and weeks like this just go to reinforce this belief in me.

All this and I have an awesome wife to boot. We have our struggles as everyone does...and there are things that we work on to improve...but we are a team...rough around the edges...but a team...and we are family. I can't think of anything better in the world...anything more important...anything more valuable...and anything more worth...my time and effort. It is my family that makes my world worth living in...and I mean...living in...being engaged in...plugged into...part of...present...in every meaning of the word.

It is this way...because I care. It is this way because WE care....and that....makes all the difference...

This is not new...but there isn't anything more important. I wish and hope for all that read these words...that you may find or have found these things in your own life. I hope for you a life of caring and commitment...a life of new beginnings...and of realizing the importance of home...being in your families...and the work that it takes...to make them healthy and strong...the work never ends...the effort is as alive and breathes as any of the members of the whole...you don't forget...to love each other...love is a verb...an action...and when it is acted upon...it is returned. May God bless you and yours...belated Merry Christmas and have a Happy New Year...and a safe and sober one...

The new job...and Heather's birthday!

Welp...I made it! I have Oh-ficially survived my first week as a clinician in a county mental health office. I have had quite the experience already and my learning curve is just absolutely HUGE! But I am so appreciative for the opportunity and I look forward to the next year with excitement and fear...knowing that I am going to grow exponentially.

I just amazes me that as much as I know...I can clearly see how much I don't know...and when it is put in my face like it was this week it is challenging to keep up. But I am. I feel great because as much as I am unsure about what I want to do with the rest of my life....I do know that I want to get these hours finished and get on with getting my license and life.

I chose to leave the classroom for the moment and I did that very reluctantly. But I knew that if I am ever to get moving with this professional pursuit I need to get my hours finished. Now I will be able to. I already have done five intakes and therefore I now have 5 clients. This is only my first week. Woof. I hit the ground running...and I am still on my feet...on my feet so far...and I will go back to a classroom someday....somewhere...

Today was Heather's birthday. We went out last night and had a good time...went to dinner and we saw Larry the cable guy...and we laughed a lot...and tomorrow we will get together with everyone to celebrate. I am a very blessed person to have her as a wife. She is a blessing in my life. Happy birthday babe...I love you.

Doing well...

Today...I sat with one of my current bosses and listened to some advice...parting advice...since I am leaving that position roughly at the end of this week.

I say roughly because although my last day in one of his classrooms will be at the end of this week...I have papers...so many papers...to grade for the students...so he is checking in on extending my last pay period by a week so that I can get paid for finishing the work...instead of making him do it LOL...

Anywah...he tells me that in the year and a half that I have worked there...teaching for them...he has never had one student complain about me. Not even one! I was thankful to hear this and really pleased. I mean...I didn't expect a lot of complaints...but heck...not even one?!? WOW! He told me how much he has appreciated me and reflected on his hiring me...saying it was my personality that sold them. He could joke with me and I with them (he and the other deans)....and they felt like I would bring in that way of being into the classroom. He was absolutely right of course. Several times with my first four classes I asked for his advice on different things...and he told me several things that all seemed to boil down to one assertion...just...be...yourself! He was and is...sooo right about that.

As I listened to him today...he tells me that I am gold now...with my graduate degrees and teaching and counseling experience...I can get a management position at a community college or university. Pull in more money and move up. It was really nice to hear and I felt like it was just at the right time for me. The other thing was it was unsolicited. He just opened up to me...about me...and I appreciated it.

He has always treated me well and I have always felt good about that relationship. He gave me a shot...and I ran with it...and it is tough giving it up now. I told him that I was really struggling with the decision because I really don't want to leave it behind. He said well...call me in a couple months and we can reevaluate...he said I am welcome back there any time I please...with open arms. That was really nice to hear...it really did feel good to be valued like that.

So why am I not staying? I keep going back and forth about it. I am starting my new job with the county as a clinician on the 10th. It is a good job and will give me that oh so hard to get and ever present pain in the neck piece of getting licensed...my precious hours...with lots of supervision...AND...I will learn....learn a ton...and quickly...so it is good...really good...but I am still going to moonlight a couple nights a week. As for now it will be doing the domestic violence groups...it is just down the street and it does actually pay a little bit better...and I will look for an online teaching gig...something I can do from my home computer.

But it is hard...giving up the classroom...and as rewarding as doing those groups can be...it is a tough choice. But it is one that I feel I had to make...for money....for experience...for convenience...well...maybe that is really what it is...I will see how it pans out for a while and reevaluate as he suggested. It is just nice to be valued by one's boss. It is a good example for me to follow in the future...when I have employees of my own. I guess for now...I will just appreciate that next week I start a whole new journey...and support Heather in her new journey...which she started today! Go Heather! She's a manager for the city now! It's good to be the King!